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Best of both worlds? 14 Aug 2014 14:41 #1

To preface this all, my wife and I went on vacation to visit my family. We spent several nights at a nice DoubleTree, where the bed was good, but not great. The last night we spent at my parents house, as they took one of my nephews on a road trip and their house was open. They had a BeautyRest mattress - still waiting to hear back from my Dad on the specifics. Both my wife and I slept amazingly well - my normal low back pain was almost non-existent in the morning and my wife said she'd slept better than any night in recent memory.

I started researching mattresses for us to purchase and yesterday we went to a local Sleep Train retailer. We tried numerous mattresses and came to the realization that we have different preferences. I'm more of a firm core with a plush top person - she's softer and pillow top for certain.

So, now we have a few options (any other ideas, please let me know - these are the ones that come to mind right away):
  1. Buy a 'compromise mattress' that's in between our preferences.
  2. Buy a split king. Not a big fan of this idea - gap in the middle or similar
  3. Buy a firm, non-pillow or plush top mattress and buy two Twin-XL toppers - one softer for her, one firmer for me.

I'm sort of partial to #3 - was looking at Brooklyn Bedding Latex Toppers - but don't know well enough to say if this is a good idea or not.

I also tried to check out Sleep Therapy beds. They're semi-local to me in San Diego, but strangely enough, none of their listed vendors carried any of the current mattress offerings. Probably not a good sign.

Thoughts or feedback?

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Best of both worlds? 14 Aug 2014 16:33 #2

Hi SDBolts619,

I started researching mattresses for us to purchase and yesterday we went to a local Sleep Train retailer.


The first place I would start your research is the mattress shopping tutorial here which has all the basic information, steps, and guidelines that you will need to make the best possible choices ... and know how and why to avoid the worst ones. Hopefully it will also help to keep you away from major brands and chain stores.

We tried numerous mattresses and came to the realization that we have different preferences. I'm more of a firm core with a plush top person - she's softer and pillow top for certain.

We tried numerous mattresses and came to the realization that we have different preferences. I'm more of a firm core with a plush top person - she's softer and pillow top for certain.

So, now we have a few options (any other ideas, please let me know - these are the ones that come to mind right away):

Buy a 'compromise mattress' that's in between our preferences.
Buy a split king. Not a big fan of this idea - gap in the middle or similar
Buy a firm, non-pillow or plush top mattress and buy two Twin-XL toppers - one softer for her, one firmer for me.


I'm sort of partial to #3 - was looking at Brooklyn Bedding Latex Toppers - but don't know well enough to say if this is a good idea or not.


There is a little more information about choosing a mattress for a couple that have different needs and preferences in the first part of post #2 here .

Buy a 'compromise mattress' that's in between our preferences.


Some mattresses have a design and combination of layers and components that works well for two people but your own careful and objective testing (using the testing guidelines in the tutorial post) will be the best way for you to know which ones they are. You may be surprised that on some mattresses you may not need to compromise as much as you think because it may feel firmer or softer to one of you than the other. A knowledgeable retailer with good experience in helping couples choose a mattress that works well for both can help with this.

Buy a split king. Not a big fan of this idea - gap in the middle or similar


Many couples do well with this and it can be a particularly good choice if you have an adjustable bed where you would like to raise and lower each side independently. There is more about the pros and cons of split king mattresses in post #8 here and in this topic that may be helpful as well including some ways that can help with any gap in the middle.

Buy a firm, non-pillow or plush top mattress and buy two Twin-XL toppers - one softer for her, one firmer for me.


This can work well "in theory" if the firmness of the support core in the mattress is suitable for both of you because you would only be changing the thickness/softness of the comfort layers but this can also add some uncertainty and risk to the process if you aren't able to test a specific mattress/topper combination in person because choosing a topper that works well with a specific mattress and person can sometimes be almost as difficult as choosing a mattress in the first place (see post #2 here ).

There is also one other option that can work very well which is a "split layer" mattress that has a different combination of layers and components on each side of the mattress but is all inside the same cover. These are more common with latex and latex hybrid mattresses and are made by many of the manufacturers that are members of this site. Some of these are component mattresses which allow you to either rearrange the layers on each side or exchange a layer if your sleeping experience indicates that you need to do any fine tuning on either side of the mattress.

The better options and possibilities I'm aware of in the San Diego area are listed in post #2 here and I know that Sandiegomattressmakers makes a side to side split option and there may be others as well. You certainly have some very good choices in the area.

Phoenix
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Last edit: by Phoenix.
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